Little Old Lady

Finally, it was my day off. This week had been long, but of course, it was no longer than any other. I knew that this weekend needed to be different. It needed something new. There was no way I could sit at my computer or confine myself in my room. I really needed out. I decided a bit of fresh air would do me some good.

A walk was the perfect idea. After all, the sun was out and the winter's chill had long since left us. I began walking. Plugged in to my iPod, I related to the lyrics and considered the songs one after another in my own context of life. It was great to have some fresh air.

As I continued on, I noticed a little old lady coming towards me. She was walking as well, but time and life had certainly taken its toll on her body. She was hunched over and walking with hands clasped behind her. She was very petite and I wondered if years before she had once been taller? She walked very slow, in small shuffling steps, but nonetheless with direction. I wondered if she was someone's mother, grandmother, or sister? Where was she going? Or, was she simply taking a walk for some fresh air just as I was?

We passed each other and it occurred to me that my bike was still parked at work. I knew it was the perfect weather to continue on, pick up my bike, and ride it all the way back home. When I reached my bike, I placed my things in the basket, turned up my iPod and headed home. I had completely forgotten about that little old lady. But, as I rode my bike, I saw the very same woman continuing towards me. I had covered almost my entire trip to and from work before she had even made it home. I realized how lucky I was to be in good health. I realized how lucky she was to be able to walk and enjoy life. Then I considered the reason why fate had brought us together again.

We go through life surrounded by strangers. Each individual with their own path is surrounded by strangers themselves. However, on occasion, you notice someone, or something. A bird perched outside your window all day sings to you as you clean your house. A bug sits beside you at the bus stop happily shaded from the sun. A baby smiles at you from her mother's lap on the train. A little old lady walks beside you on your quest for fresh air. I have always considered the reasons why we notice some things as opposed to others. Why do some people become a part of our life and make a mark on our memory while others just fade away into their own journeys?

We can never know why certain people places or things impact our life or our memories, but I am content to know that they hold a small or a big place in my life's journey. And perhaps even I hold a place in the memories and journeys of others..... -M

Spring Cleaning

Spring has arrived and despite the fickle weather, I am inspired! The cherry blossoms have come and gone and April showers are bringing out beautiful flowers. My life could also use a bit o' spring..... spring cleaning that is! It is really amazing how things can pile up in a matter of 7 months in a studio apartment. Do I really need to save that bus ticket from my trip to Hokkaido? Will I really wear that shirt I HAD TO HAVE 3 years ago that still has the price tag on it? Let's face it: probably not.

Similarly, my computer is chuck full of music and pictures and movies that are taking up precious space and speed. My computer is more of a mess than my closets! Ironically, it is supposed to make my life easier! So it is time to organize those iTunes, delete those unwanted photos that no one should ever see and use my external drive the way it was meant to be used!

Lastly, spring has inspired me to get my life on track as well. (This is not only because bikini season is around the corner) I want to stay on top of my business, exercise, diet, and social life! I need to find a balance among all of the things that are important to me and make me happy......This is really beginning to sound like those New Year's resolutions I made several months ago..... oops...... Well, as I said before, there is always tomorrow!

So pour yourself a glass (for me it would be red wine) raise it up, and make a toast to spring! May it inspire us all to begin anew, plant some flowers, pay taxes, get rid of piles, lose weight, dust under the bed, and smile! -M

Turbulence

Please fasten your seatbelt as we expect some turbulence on our decent.

It was a rough landing to say the least. As I squeezed my friend's hand and closed my eyes, I once again realized I placed my life in the hands of a pilot I had never met.

Every time I get on a plane, I wander down the aisle to find my seat. I shove my things beneath the seat in front of me, fasten my seatbelt, and wait for take off. I grab the free magazine in the seatback pocket and pretend that it is interesting to me. I read it just long enough to distract me from the takeoff process; the defiance of gravity. I find the crossword or the sudoku that some previous passenger had attempted to solve and imagine what he or she might have been like. I find the map of the world and look up my destination and also consider which other corner of the world I may like to visit someday. I dare not read the safety instruction card for fear of jinxing the flight. My friend, however, picks up the safety information and laughs at the animation. I quickly realize how my silly supserstitions can cause my imagination to get the best of me. I sit back, relax, and enjoy my flight.

Ladies and Gentlemen, the captain has turned off the fasten your seat belt sign.

We landed safely. It was an amazing trip, as usual. Will the few moments of turbulence that ignited fear prevent me from flying ever again? No. How can I ever see what I want to see or do what I want to do without taking a chance to get there? Enough said..... -M

Today....

...I will wake up. I will have coffee. I will take a shower and brush my teeth. I will wash my clothes. I will clean the house. I will write a thank you note. I will check my email. I will water my plants. I will open the window. I will take out my trash. I will recycle. I will ride my bike. I will buy some groceries. I will think about my friends. I will miss my family. I will try and excercise. I will question what tomorrow may bring. I will hear music. I will smile. I will eat. I will worry. I will think. I may cry. I will laugh. I will live.... -M

Un Ami ou Un Amour

"Men and women can't be friends because the sex part always gets in the way." -When Harry Met Sally

CAN men and women just be friends? Lately, my experience with this situation has been a little too close to home. Let's face it. Most of my friends really ARE men, but they are also GAY. Sure! I have straight male friends as well. But now that I think about it, even when the relationship seems purely platonic, I always have the tiny thought in the back of my mind, "What if..."! A great romantic relationship is one that has a strong foundation of friendship....so it is easy for me for me to consider, if only for a moment, what my friends may be like in another "context". Crossing the boundary of friendship and love is definitely a danger zone! Ironically, the very friendship that may make your relationship so great could easily be destroyed if lines are crossed. I wouldn't consider myself a risk-taker. But, when it comes to love, I am willing to take a chance....even if it is my friend.

Have I answered my question? Well, truthfully, I think that it depends on the person. I know that I CAN and WANT to have male friends: gay and straight. Often when I need advice, it is so great to get a man's perspective. And, I hate to break it to you ladies, but men are less dramatic. (I am NOT excluding myself from the dramatic category!) I think the key is to have have ultimate faith in the friendship above all. Secondly, I leave my future to fate. I am confident that what is meant to be will be.... so if I persue something with a friend that doesn't work out, no one is to blame except for fate. So, here I am fate... ready and willing to see who will sweep me off my feet. -M

i Want That

i head off to work amidst a sea of people plugged into white earphones. i reach into my pocket and touch the click wheel on my new video iPod and scroll to find my favorite song. i realize i am fully willing to participate in the iERA.... i am the proud owner of my third iPod since their intoroduction in 2001 (and wanting to purchase my fourth) and my fourth apple laptop. iTunes has completely taken over my computer with songs, tv shows, and movies which conveniently update to my iPod with a mere cable to my computer. iWeb has fully enabled me to design a webpage through .Mac in order to keep friends and family updated on my life in Tokyo. Should I mention iPhoto, iMovie, and iDVD? I have created several wedding slideshows for friends and family that have really tempted me to purchase high quality cameras in order to get more creative with video and photo editing. Call my crazy, but call my on my new iPhone in JUNE! I cannot wait to purchase Apple's newest product to fall from their tree. The iPhone will completely replace each portable device in my gorgeous handbag and combine them into one. If i haven't convinced you to run to your nearest apple store to buy iSOMETHING, then I urge you to atleast window shop. i know you will enjoy the view. -M

The Truth Hurts, and Is Also Hard to Tell....

I feel as though I have gone through life knowing that honesty is always the best policy. This notion has been so ingrained in my head that I have become afraid of even telling the smallest white lie. But, even with my fear of lying, I am certainly capable of making it happen....with a huge guilt trip to follow.... But I often wonder why we lie? Do we lie merely to protect ourselves? Avoid confrontation? Forget embarrassing moments? To exclude others? Whatever the reason, it is amazing how transparent a lie can be! The feeling of knowing you have been lied to really hurts. Not only have you been deceived, but, you know you have been deceived on purpose. The truth is, nothing hurts more than a lie..... and I am learning that I must surround myself with people who are comfortable in telling the truth.....because without that, there is nothing.-M