Single-ly Ever After

Circa December 2010


Once upon a time, there was a thirty something singleton maiden who longed for a prince...... Oh, hell... This chapter of my love life is so far away from a fairytale that even I cannot pretend to write it that way.

It was a moment in my life that I'd rather soon forget, but instead, I will write about it to rise above the utter a-holeness of the whole thing. The only way to look at this experience is to laugh and guffaw and the ridiculousness of some people's blatant lack of respect for anyone..... And hope that karma is truly the bitch we claim she is, and that she will come calling in some way, shape or form to his life.

The backstory? This is nearly six years ago, mind you...Well, as most bad dating experiences start, I had joined match, and decided that I wouldn't search, but see who peruses my profile. Low and behold, a nice looking guy from my college town gives me a hit, and I email him.

Enter 6 years of short email communications, failed attempts at meeting one another, and some unknown number of Facebook pokes which of course were initiated by him, and obviously didn't mean anything more than a click of a mouse.

Fast forward to the present, and the impending a-hole experience that I could really have done without. Both home for Christmas vacation, we decide to meet up.

The next series of events should have clued me in, but the hopeful singleton maiden in me couldn't let go of the hope that this could be the one that would save me. Little did I know that he would actually swoop me up, throw me off the horse and sell my location to the non-existent wicked witch.

Date was set. Place an location determined by me, but official request by him. THEN he asked if he could bring his brother. A few hours later, he would be wine tasting prior to the date.....then he was running late..... Then he was running even later.... Then he asked if I would meet him and his brother at their hotel room. YES I said hotel room. THEN he said no..... Then he asked if we could pick them up..... And he changed the location. I was flexible. Maybe too flexible, and for a dancer who has barely ever achieved splits in her life, this was really going above and beyond for the faint glimmer of hope.

His resume? Late twenty something early thirty something. AGE RANGE CHECK! Attending USC for Masters in Business EDUCATED CHECK! Already owns his own business JOB CHECK!! Loves to visit family in the bay area where he grew up. FAMILY GUY CHECK and BONUS: FROM BAY AREA

So, emails came.... "I'm so excited to meet you" "I feel like I've known you forever" little did I know it would all end with "I'm sorry"

I won't bore you with any of the awkward details.... He seemed nice, looked just like his photos..... Had a few extra s's in his speech which were questionable.... His brother looked young, and acted young.... But seemed nice.

My prego sis-in-law had joined up for a water on the rocks and splash of moral support. She didn't know what she was in for, and obviously neither did I, or we would still be at home with the family, eating peppermint ice cream and listening to pandora.

They didn't like the bar.... They said it was an older crowd.... We decided to leave.... Migrate...., but I wanted to make sure K got to her car okay.

Please fasten your seatbelt, because what you are about to read will seriously shock you. We headed back to walk K to the car.... And the boys trailed behind.... I was kind of worried about how I looked from behind, but that should have been the least of my worries.

I turned around, and they had disappeared. Gone. Like dirty alleyway ditch of a bad date. It was cold out, but my face went hot and tingly.... I panicked. Had I just been ditched? The day before Christmas eve? No, there must be some explanation..... 6 years of silly communication for a serious KO to the EGO? For someone that I barely knew, thought could be gay, and had more wrinkles than I could see in his pictures? No.... This was not happening!!!

Oh, but it was. We quickly turned around to try and find them.....as if there we some other magical explanation....like a credit card left at the bar.... They didn't tell us they had gone back because.... Uh.... Well... Whatever, we turned around anyway.

Back at the bar, there we saw them, entering the same place once again, thinking they had successfully dropped the extra unwanted baggage on the chilly cement sidewalk. I ran over and quickly brushed past the bouncer who had already checked my ID.... They didn't see me coming, and I grabbed his shoulder and asked him what he was doing..... His brother immediately walked out of the bar and pretended to be on some important call.... I looked my date in the eye and asked him what any normal girl would ask, "WHAT THE F%#¥?!!!!!

There was no life behind his eyes.... No look of guilt..... And he blamed it all on his brother. For a guy who had the balls to ditch a girl who had mustered up the courage to finally meet him after 6 years taking precious time that she only had with her family only once in a blue moon, he didn't have the balls to back up why he had done it.

I didn't wait for an explanation. I just walked away....in my new boots pounding the cold paved sidewalk.... I could see my own breath start to speed up, and I could feel the tears fighting their way past the back of my eyes like water ready to explode and break free from a dam.

I couldn't even secretly pretend it didn't happen, because my sis-in-law had seen it all a go down. I was being forced to face the bad music like being stuffed in a broken elevator where the music won't shut off.

And it would all end with a short and simple email of, "I'm sorry" from him which I promptly marked as junk. The deletion of the emails leading up followed quickly behind, and the "friendship" on Facebook was deleted..... as if it had never been there at all.

And she continued to live single-ly ever after.